hope

Christmas break is here. for me at least. my exams were done yesterday and i am so glad that they are through, but i dont want to be here. in the middle of this. i feel like i am being beaten from both sides. surrounded and being closed in on by the second. any given moment, i will be engulfed in these waves crashing around me. slowly dragging me under. how can something so beautiful and perfect on the outside be so horrible on the inside. something so whole and complete is crumbling within. slowly but surely being taken away. soon to disappear from this place that we live in. it saddens me that the thing that once was wholesome and truthful is going away. my memories will be the only document. the only thing that can prove that this that is falling apart was once good and pure. but every now and then, i can see fleeting glimpses of the past, of what once was, and could be again. there is little hope, but hope still. and i will continue to have this hope, to have faith in what can be. i will always remain in faith, even though things seem so unlikely to happen, anything is possible... <3